BlogHer Deliverables

Long after most of the Internet has quieted down about BlogHer, I'm still trying to put together the perfect post to explain why I was so excited about this conference and why I had such a wonderful experience in Chicago.

There's a lesson here, of course. And it's almost so trite that I hesitate to point it out. It is, of course, this: Perfectionism leads to procrastination. This is the third time I've tried to write this post, and I'm determined to get through it now. So...

Why should a conference of 800 women bloggers have me in such a tizzy? When I tried to explain the conference to people in my "off-line" world, I could tell some of them didn't really get it. I realized I was doing a poor job of describing BlogHer when someone asked me, "So, it's like a conference about computer stuff?"

Yes and no. But for me, mostly no. That's what I love about blogging. The technology surrounding and supporting it is cool. And I have loads to learn. But what the technology enables is way cooler. I was excited to meet other women who are sharing their opinions, telling their stories, and creating communities online. I was excited to meet other women who "get" blogging.

You know how you build something up in your mind and the real thing can barely compare? Well, BlogHer wasn't like that. It may be the best conference I've ever been to. I met so many interesting women over those three days. I'm still working through the stack of cards that I collected, visiting new blogs and sending little email "hellos." I was also touched by how many other women were interested in me. They wanted to hear my story as much as I wanted to hear theirs. There was a strong sense of community and good juju that I never experienced at the business networking events of my previous life.

The days weren't just about meeting and greeting, though. There was a jam-packed schedule of sessions to choose from. I mostly stuck with The Art of Life track, but ventured into a few Business and Technical sessions. I'm still going through all of my notes. That's another thing that really impressed me about this conference: its usefulness. Maybe it's just because I'm more interested and motivated on this topic than others, but I don't usually find much value in seminars and conference sessions. All too often it's a bunch of talk without any useful take-aways. But I have tons of resources to check out and ideas to pursue after BlogHer.

Before I left for Chicago, I made a list of BlogHer Deliverables, a mini wish list in which I described how I wanted to weekend to go.

• Meet new kindred spirits and begin to establish meaningful friendships.
• Meet blog crushes.
• Find someone who will redesign and combine my website and blog into one fabulously designed site.
• Increase my blog audience.
• Make good professional connections for future writing work.
• Begin to learn about monetizing my blog.
• Make good connection for my book.
• Be inspired and encouraged.
• Have fun!!
• Be comfortable and confident in my own skin (and my own clothes!).
• Feel beautiful and intelligent.

Saturday night, after two very long, action-packed days, I sat in my hotel room feeling very tired and a little sorry for myself. Nothing was actually wrong, but my internal critic started whispering in my ear, saying darkly seductive things like, "Sure you met a lot of people, but who will remember you? Will this weekend be worth anything once you're home? Maybe you made a fool of yourself, blathering on like you did, eh? And let's face it, your blog sure needs a lot of work..."

I was journaling about all of this, boo-hooing for myself when I remembered my list. As I read through it, I was shocked to realize that every single item had happened or was in the works. The only iffy one was learning about monetizing my blog. But I learned something even more important: I'm not sure if I want to monetize this space. Some people are definitely pro-ad or anti-ad. I can see the value in each scenario. I realized that I need to better define what I want this online space to be and to do. And that goes far beyond the "ad vs. ad-free" debate.

My weekend among other bloggers has me asking questions: Why do I blog? For whom do I blog? Can I be a generalist? Do I need to find a more specific niche? Does my voice come through in this writing?

To that end, why do you come here? Tell me your thoughts and preferences in the comments or by email to jennifer[at]thewordcellar[dot]com. Join the conversation, won't you?

An Exercise in Overkill (Or, Stick with what you know)

For those of you keeping abreast of the shoe situation:

Did you know that Shoes.com has free shipping? And free returns? It's like having a shoe store in your home!

So in a last minute panic to find footwear for BlogHer, I ordered seven pairs of shoes. Seven. (Note to procrastinators: Rush shipping ain't free. Argh.)

Here are the shoes I ordered, hoping to find one or two pairs that worked:

Here are the shoes I actually took to BlogHer. (Note: Only two of the Shoes.com brood made the cut.) (Also note peeping toe with French pedicure cuteness at bottom of frame.)

And here are the shoes I actually wore at BlogHer:

Two pair of flip-flops that I already owned!

Now if you'll excuse me, I have to package up six pairs of shoes for a free return trip. (The Skechers may get to stay, I'm still not sure.)

Clearing the Mental Clutter

View of Lake Michigan from Navy Pier, Chicago

I tend toward chaos. Without constant attention and diligence, I'm just a messy person. I enjoy well-organized spaces, as long as they feel lived-in. But left unchecked, I create clutter: magazines, newspapers, mail, print-outs, dirty dishes, laundry -- they all pile up so easily.

And that's just the external mess. The internal disorder is so much worse. My mind backlogs with half-formed ideas, I start to forget things, and frustration sets in. As an editor for my clients, I'm extremely detail-oriented, even nitpicky. I can take a muddled manuscript and infuse it with the rosy glow of clarity. But when my mental clutter overflows, it's my own writing that suffers. I may have loads to say, but I struggle to get it out in an orderly -- and interesting -- manner.

One of the ways I combat the messy mind syndrome is by cleaning. My physical environment deeply affects my mood and mindset. So I try to clear my head by clearing a room. Today I spent hours digging out from the embarrassing mess that filled my office. I feel a bit more focused, but I'm still all over the map.

Part of the problem is that I haven't written my morning pages for about a week. Every day when I get up, I try to write three pages in a journal. The writing doesn't have to be good or coherent or interesting. It's a place to let out the chatter. Sometimes I write three pages of boring stream-of-consciousness chatter. And sometimes I hit upon something significant, or even have a small epiphany. The practice of the morning pages is part of The Artist's Way: A Spiritual Path to Higher Creativity. And the more I write them, the more clearheaded I am.

Right now, I have so much I want to share with you. Thoughts on community (online and off), my time in Chicago, and what exactly the "real world" is. Please bear with me as I sort through the chaff.

And tell me, what do you do to clear out your mental clutter?

Back in the 'real' world...

Well, I have returned from Chicago and BlogHer 07 safe and sound, tired and inspired, overwhelmed and excited, and with so many more emotions and ideas. I'm transitioning slowly back to the so-called real world, and will have more to say about the conference and the amazing people I met in the coming days. I'll also be musing on what that phrase "the real world" really means.

If I met you this past weekend and you're reading this, please say hi! (And for all of those who were concerned about my shoe situation, I'll update on that, too.)

Me in 10 Secs.

I'm a freelance writer and editor who until recently thought I had absolutely no talent in the visual arts. But I've been painting and no one has laughed yet. I long for the sea and feel most like myself near large bodies of water. (Yet I live in a nearly landlocked state.) I need everyday beauty to feel whole. I'm not sure if I've ever been stung by a bee, and my very first cavity at the age of 23 involved a root canal. I'm currently reading The Artist's Way and it's changing my life. If you like good food, deep conversation, and thinking for yourself, let's be friends!

(Why do I feel like I just wrote a personal ad?)

Great idea from Mocha Momma. Meet other BlogHers here.

Intro yo'self in the comments -- whether you're going to Chicago or not!