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Saturday
Jul122008

Insecurities Disclaimer: BlogHer 2008

her story will never be written by sixhours' etsy shop

So Sparksfley at Sparks and Butterflies (found via a Twitter from Megan at Velveteen Mind) decided to post a list of disclaimers borne out of her anxiety about attending BlogHer in San Francisco next week.

I like this idea of putting our insecurities out there for all the world to see. It helps to make us human and reminds us that everyone else is human, too. We all have issues. We're all afraid in some way. We're all sure that everyone will notice that we're not thin/pretty/smart/popular enough.

And isn't that such crap? I mean, here we are, a bunch of educated, smart, beautiful, sassy bloggers, and we're all secretly tortured by our petty insecurities. I say that insecurity needs company to stop feeling so sorry for itself. I left my list of disclaimers on the original Sparks and Butterflies post. As I'm wont to do, I wrote a lot. Too much for a comment, really, although Sparksfley indulged me and let it stand.

So in honor of breaking down barriers and being more confident, I offer you my list of disclaimers (modified slightly to make sense here). Feel free to add yours in the comments or add a link to your own disclaimer blog post. You don't even have to be going to BlogHer to create a disclaimer list. Jump on the down-with-feeling-not-good-enough bandwagon!

  1. I talk a lot. (This seems to be a common condition among bloggers.) Sometimes I hear myself babbling on incessantly, but am powerless to stop the madness. I try to quiet down, but it just doesn't always work. Plus, I have a lot of stories to tell. (See explanation in blog header.)

  2. I nervous laugh. I just discovered this after listening to myself conduct several interviews on tape. I am somewhat mortified by this discovery. I will try to keep the giggles down to a minimum.

  3. I'm not sure if I qualify as chubby or downright fat in most people's eyes. According to those Body Mass Index charts, I think I'm obese. Still, that seems a bit excessive to me.

  4. I'm letting my hair grow out because I have this desire to be all flowy and feminine lately. Unfortunately, my hair is usually much cuter shorter. So just indulge me and forgive me if it's a bad hair day. (Wait, is it humid in SF? The hair will do much better if it's not humid.)

  5. I hate shoe and clothes shopping. I like to have cute shoes and clothing, but because I hate going out to hunt for them, I may be lacking in that department. Especially the shoes. What can I say? I have wide feet. (To compensate for this, I'm getting a pedicure next Wednesday. This will distract from the lack of cute shoes.) [For those of you not acquainted with the madness that is the BlogHer conference, "cute shoes" always seems to be a hot topic of pre- and post-conference discussion. Case in point:

    I'm Wearing Cute Shoes at BlogHer 08

  6. I'll be using up my old business cards at BlogHer. They're very elegant, but rather bland. I'll try to have more exciting cards next year. Just don't mistake me for boring if you only see my card.

  7. My approach to life is: "Wherever you are, whatever you're doing, act like you belong and no one will know the difference." I'm pretty good at doing this. But the truth is, I often feel like I'm on the margins of things. So if you see me standing around, even if I look like I know what I'm doing, feel free to join me.

Your turn!

Reader Comments (7)

Oh, my gosh, I'm so on the margin I can't even bear to ATTEND BlogHer. Maybe if I ever make it there, you can give me some tips on acting like I belong--great skill to have.

July 14, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterJen Lee

No lack of insecurities here:

1. Body dysmorphic disorder that has come with my PMS
2. Wanting to just start my period and get it over with so I can lose the 3-5 weight gain, cramps, bloating, etc. before Thursday! (no such luck, yet)
3. Hair: cut it? don't cut it? Dye it or not? (I decided to have it trimmed and just live with the gray.)
4. Trying on outfits with above mentioned BDD.
5. Fingernails? Toenails? Polish them or not? Can I quit picking them long enough for them to be presentable before Thursday????
6. What to wear? It's 80 degrees here and 65 there. Yikes! (At least that means I won't have to bare my arms in sleeveless dresses!)
7. Ditto the business card quandry. I have so many cards- one for each of the various Renaissance Soul facets of my current existence - that I've decided to create an entirely new one that lists a medley of my identities :-) (They will be handmade - perhaps even on the plane on the way there!)
8. My teeth are not as white as I want them to be. I'll be Crest White-stripping it up 'til Friday morning, I'm sure :-0
9. A Moon-child Cancerian with PMS, a full-moon week this week!, a trip to a new city to be with 1000 other women, waiting for my period to start and the hyped up emotions to subside...and did I mention the body dyspmorphic disorder???

Is that enough? Geez!!!

Thanks for asking! And for sharing.

July 14, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterLisa

I came here right after reading your recent tweet. I'm not going to Blogher but if I were, I'd look for you IRL.


I read your list yesterday but I can't remember what's on it because this how I think about you:

You are a wonderful writer (whom I recently discovered through Rachelle) with a beautiful smile and great sense of humour.

July 15, 2008 | Unregistered Commenterelaine

Jen: If we started our own group of people on the margins, would that make us the new center? And if so, would we want that? Hmm....

Lisa: You really went for the gusto with that list. Thanks for sharing so openly, my friend!

Elaine: And this is how I think about you: A cool Canadian who knows when to throw an extra 'h' into words that need them (like "humour"). And also? The woman who made my day with her kind words. (Do you have a blog? It's not showing up in your Blogger profile.)

p.s. to Elaine: By the way, it's totally cool if you don't blog. I just wanted to stop by your online home if you do! :)

Hi Jennifer.

Yes, I do blog. I'm the Elle_Ann in your list of twitter followers.

I have a Squarespace blog, which I've been tweaking today. Here's the link to one of the journals on it: http://greensandberries.squarespace.com/edible-balcony-garden-journal/

I'd love if you popped by for a visit.

July 15, 2008 | Unregistered Commenterelaine

I clam up when I'm faced with talking to strangers around me, but once I start talking I can't stop. I think I once held a couple prisoner last summer with my talking. I wasn't blabbering on about myself, I was actually asking them all sorts of questions.

I JUST WOULDN'T STOP! I think I heard later they took a restraining order out on me.

July 16, 2008 | Unregistered Commenterjen

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